Ah, New Year’s Eve. The most hyped-force-yourself-to-buy-a-new-outfit-and-swear-you’re having-the-best-time-of-your-life holiday of the year! What other city better guarantees a positively epic night than New York? Despite Dick Clark and the glistening ball drop, it still seems like a big overrated jig to me.
1. You will be surrounded by one million people in Times Square (a smallish area given the crowd) with no access for immediate escape.
2. No public drinking. At least you won’t have a champagne hangover? If that’s a plus…
3. No public restrooms. Adults wear diapers in case they “have to go.” Yes, for real. Pretty sexy, huh?
4. It’s cold. I can somewhat rationalize dressing myself in every article of fleece and dri-fit that I own for a sports game, but not so much to countdown one minute of time.
5. You wait for 9-ish hours out in aforementioned cold. Most people arrive in Times Square mid-afternoon to secure a good view. Haven’t you heard? We American’s don’t wait around well. Disney World is even considering options to revamp its lines due to American impatience!
Now, I don’t mean to take on a bah-humbug attitude about the New Year, if the above is your jam then totally go for it. One ton of confetti and an appearance of Giuliana and Bill is a pretty enticing offer, but I still pass. Instead, I elect to send my New Year’s wish to the Times Square Confetti Gods and watch from the comfort of a warm apartment and fancy T.V. as that confetti wish rains down upon the crazies in Times Square!
Alternatively, many people elect to spend their NYE at a swank or not-so-swank bar with an expensive cover charge. Most of these offers are in the $100 – $200 price range (“But it includes a free champagne toast!” your friends will say) and involve dense crowds fighting to get to the bar. Admittedly, I’ve done this scene a few years running, and though I consider it a city rite of passage of sorts, I will also be opting out this year. It just takes paying 500% what you would on a normal night out and being stranded in the bitter cold and stilettos due to severe cab shortage to deter you in future years!
Instead, I will be hosting a party in the comfort of our apartment for the first time in NYC. Some of the typical New Year’s problems will persist: a line for the bathroom, ears ringing from obnoxious noise makers and, hopefully, a mild champagne hangover. Good riddance, 2010. I salute those of you heading out to Times Square or any destination requiring a cab (including my apartment…).
Cheers. Salud. Santé. Salute. Prost. That’s all the languages I can think of for now, but let it be known that Santa brought me new luggage for Christmas and I’m anticipating more travel in 2011!